Parents
by Minagorishi
Summary: Draco's parents want him to bring his new girlfriend home for the Winter Holidays. One problem: his "girlfriend" is none other than Harry Potter!
1. I Need a Girlfriend

"Parents"

By Minagorishi

Hey there! I know that I haven't written in a while, so...yeah...Sorry! Kyaaaaaah! Anyways, this fic is going to be completely insane, and I don't know how long it will last, but thereIS a plot (that will be quite unapparent in some places).

**Summary:** Draco's parents want him to bring his girlfriend home for the Winter Holidays. One problem: his "girlfriend" is one Harry Potter!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter–it owns me...This takes place in seventh year. Some parts of the books are ignored completely (i.e.: Dumbly's and Snuffles' deaths), while others are right there where they belong (i.e.: ferret and the Half Blood Prince being Snape).Obviously, Hogwarts is still in operation for Harry's seventh year.

**Warnings:** Completely OOC at points, some language, slashy fun (don't like, don't read!), insanity, bad music, bunnies, and chapter titles that may or may not make sense. I'll add more when I think of them, and not all of the aforementioned are present in this chapter. I also must warn you that flames are for roasting weenies. If you don't have a weenie, I shall roast that of your boyfriend/ fiancee/ husband. If you haven't got one of those, I'll roast the weenie of your closest male friend...if they have one. If not, I shall find a weenie that is near and dear to you, and it shall be roasted! Constructive criticism is appreciated, just don't outright flame me. There is a difference! Thank you.

Prologue

"I Need a Girlfriend"

"'Dearest Son. We were informed by your lovely friend Ms. Parkinson that the two of you were not together because you are currently seeing someone. Your Father and I would like to meet her. You should bring her to the Manor for the Winter Holidays. Love, Mother.' I'm absolutely going to murder that cow." Draco fumed, rushing off to find Pansy. He found her in the Slytherin Common Room. "Pansy!" He shouted, causing the brunette girl to emit a small yelp and spin around to face the furious blonde. "Why in the name of Salazar did you tell my parents that I was seeing someone? Are you out of your sodding mind?"

"Well, Drake, seeing as they confronted me in Hogsmeade as you were passing by right behind them whilst holding Harry fucking Potter's hand like it was golden, and seeing as they asked why we weren't together–though they didn't notice that I had Cho with me, thank Merlin–I said you were seeing someone. Of course they asked for a name and house, I merely stated that I did not look at girls and could not remember the name, but she was very nice. So I'd watch where I direct my anger if I were you."

"I apologize, Pans. If you want, you and Cho can come to the Manor with us for the Hols."

Pansy gasped. "What? You're taking Harry home for the Hols? Are you insane?"

"I don't have much of a choice, Pansy," Draco sighed. "I think I have a plan, though." He ran his hands through his hair, a sure sign that he was stressed.

Pansy decided that it would be unwise to ask of his plan. "I'll ask her. Thanks, Drake. Good luck with Potter's stubborn arse."

"I don't know how much of a problem I'd have getting him to agree," Draco chuckled mildly, calling over his shoulder as he walked towards his dorms.

_Later_

Harry walked into Draco's room, shutting the door behind him. "Hey, babe. Nice arse. Hope it doesn't wear out easily." He sat behind his boyfriend on his bed, his legs around Draco's waist.

"Good thing I was the one who asked you out–if you told me that before, I probably would've kicked your arse. I know you don't talk to girls like that." Harry ignored the comment, kissing him on the cheek.

"What're you reading?" Harry asked. Draco showed him the title: "'Undetectable and Unbreakable Charms'. What the hell do you need that for, Luv?"

"Harry, we've got a bit of a problem. My parents want me to bring you home for the Winter Hols."

"So? It isn't like they're Death Eaters, anymore."

"That may be, but they are rather homophobic. Plus, Dumbly-dork said that you can't leave the castle 'till we go kick Voldie's arse."

"That may be an issue, there. Any ideas?"

"That's what the book is for. There's a spell in here somewhere that'll turn you into a girl."

"That works. How do you know that it's in there?"

"I used to use the spell when I'd go clubbing summer before fifth year. I'd go as a girl so I could meet guys."

Harry was flabbergasted. "You used to WHAT? How did I not know about this?"

"Oh, but you did." Draco smirked at his boyfriend's confused look. "Do you remember a girl named Kathryn? Long, dirty blonde hair dyed blood red at the tips and brown eyes?"

"Holy shit, Drake, that was you?"

"Yup. I had to escape the Manor for a bit."

"Damn. That still doesn't explain how we're gonna ditch Dumbly. He's pretty smart for a Dumbly."

"That was a poor attempt at humor and you know it, Harry. You can do better than that."

"Humor aside, Drake, what if he comes looking for us? We'd get in so much trouble! Plus, your parents would find out."

"Shit. You're right. I guess we'll just have to kill Voldie Dearest before Winter, huh?"

"Sounds like a plan."

Yup! There you go! I hope you enjoyed! Please tell me if I should continue this story or not. Bye!


	2. Midnight Conversations

Hi, again! Hope you all enjoyed the prologue. Seeing as I haven't updated in a while, I'm posting this chapter, as well...I really am sorry about that. Stress and my evil bitch mother make it difficult for me to write humor. Plus, I got into a fight on my birthday and such...So, please enjoy this and I hope that further updates are not so spaced. Also, apologies in advance for the extremely short chapter; I need it as a filler.

**Summary:** Draco's parents want him to bring his girlfriend home for the Winter Holidays. One problem: his "girlfriend" is one Harry Potter!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter–it owns me...This takes place in seventh year. Some parts of the books are ignored completely (i.e.: Dumbly's and Snuffles' deaths), while others are right there where they belong (i.e.: ferret and the Half Blood Prince being Snape).Obviously, Hogwarts is still in operation for Harry's seventh year.

**Warnings:** Completely OOC at points, some language, slashy fun (don't like, don't read!), insanity, bad music, bunnies, and chapter titles that may or may not make sense. I'll add more when I think of them, and not all of the aforementioned are present in this chapter. I also must warn you that flames are for roasting weenies. If you don't have a weenie, I shall roast that of your boyfriend/ fiancee/ husband. If you haven't got one of those, I'll roast the weenie of your closest male friend...if they have one. If not, I shall find a weenie that is near and dear to you, and it shall be roasted! Constructive criticism is appreciated, just don't outright flame me. There is a difference! Thank you.

Chapter 1

"Midnight Conversations"

"Drake?"

"Yup."

"Still up?"

"Would I have answered you the first time if I wasn't?" Harry laughed at his boyfriend's wry comment.

"No, guess not. Hey–what's your favorite part about being on a swing?"

"First, where the bloody hell did that pointless question come from? Second, what in the names of Merlin and Salazar is a 'swing'?" Harry sat bolt upright at this question posed by his boyfriend.

"You've never been on a swing?" Harry's slightly maniacal tone was beginning to scare the blonde.

"Um...no. Why would I have asked what it was if I had been on one before?"

The next thing Draco knew, he was being dragged away to the Room of Requirement.

Hope you enjoyed! Please review! This chapter is dedicated to Mindy, who called me at 6:50 this morning on the way to the plane. Luv ya, konechan (Japanese for 'lil sis, for those of you who don't know)!


End file.
